What is this?
If you’re surrounded by posts, pings, notifications and none of it makes you feel actually close to anyone…
If hanging out with real people feels strangely difficult now…
This is for you.
I’m Dr. Ali Mattu, a psychologist who has spent 15 years helping people navigate a world that’s gotten too loud and too lonely at the same time. I’ve sat with thousands of people who were doing everything “right” (texting, scrolling, swiping) and still felt unseen, unheard, and unable to find the words for what they were really carrying.
What I’ve learned is that so many of us are holding a lot inside, trying hard to say the “right” thing, and simply needing a place where we don’t have to perform anymore.
This is why I started Brain Knows Better.
To counter the constant scroll.
To offer a pocket of honesty in a feed full of performance.
To remind you that connection is still possible.
Why I Write
I recently started writing letters to my kids. Something funny they said. A small insight they stumbled into. A moment that was hard for them or hard for me. I write them as close to the moment as I can, tuck them away, and save them for the end of the year.
What surprised me was how much it changed me.
The ritual made me slow down. It made me pay attention. It helped me show up for my kids in a way I’d always meant to, but never managed consistently.
I’ve spent years trying to show up consistently for the people who connect with my work. Sometimes I’ve done it well. Other times I’ve disappeared. But writing these letters taught me that connection doesn’t come from the big things. It comes from small, consistent moments that build over time.
That’s what I’m trying to create here. A ritual of showing up honestly, again and again, so none of us feel quite so alone.
What You’ll Find Here
No jargon.
No hacks.
No pressure.
Just letters from me to you.
Stories that help things make sense.
Small actions that feel doable.
And a kinder voice than the one in your head.
My Background
I’m a psychologist, dad, husband, and someone whose mind has never been quiet.
For years I practiced clinical psychology and watched more and more people slip through the cracks. Not because anything was wrong with them, but because the world was changing faster than our systems could keep up.
So I stepped outside the system.
I started making mental health videos and those videos found millions of people. Along the way, my work showed up on Netflix, HBO, and in The New York Times. But the part that mattered most was the conversations it sparked. The comments. The emails. The community that finally felt seen.
Now I’m building tools for a world that’s fast, noisy, lonely, and a little upside down.
And I’m writing these letters because they help me too.
What does “Brain Knows Better” mean?
There’s a line in the Death Cab for Cutie song A Lack of Color:
And when I see you
I really see you upside down
But my brain knows better
It picks you up and turns you around.
Your eyes literally take in the world upside down. Your brain quietly flips it, over and over, making things feel right side up again.
Life works like that too.
Some days everything feels upside down. But our brains are wired to find their footing again. Sometimes they just need a nudge in the right direction.
That’s what I hope this newsletter can be, a gentle nudge back toward clarity, for both of us.
Want to reach me?
Leave a comment, hit reply on any post, or email me.
I read what you send and I write back when I can.
This is a conversation, not a broadcast.
